dirrrrty pop: New Music – Sirens


Karina Chambers, Katherine Monaco and Lea Reynolds, aka Sirens, are a poppy, hip-hoppy trio hailing from Newcastle, UK, who proudly claim that they are a different kind of girlband – one with plenty of talent, and, more importantly, shedloads of attitude – which, obviously, no girlband before them has ever possessed.

Surely Cheryl Tweedy would have something to say about that?
Ah, but she’s from a manufactured girl band, which doesn’t count, and besides, everyone knows she said goodbye to all her feistiness when she became Cheryl Cole and the Nations Sweetheart™

So Sirens arent a manufactured pop band?
No. Sirens describe themselves as the ‘antithesis to manufactured music’, and indeed, the girls’ apparent main selling point is the fact that they created the band all by themselves, after meeting when they were 17. Two of the members even sold their cars to fund a trip to a studio in London to record their demos, now that’s dedication for you. So no, these girls are real, and clearly are prepared to work hard for their pop stardom.

Are Sirens here to fill the girlband-shaped hole in the pop landscape? They can kick the shit out of any manufactured bands that stand in their way, and with Girls Aloud gone…
Yes, yes, I know, with Girls Aloud gone, The Saturdays being a bit shit and Girls Can’t Catch sitting pretty in the big pop dumpster in the sky, there has probably never been a better time for Sirens to strut on in and claim the throne for themselves.

Have I heard them anywhere before?
Well, according to their MySpace, one of their songs has been featured on MTV’s Newport Harbour, whatever that is. They’ve been together for five years and are signed to Kitchenware records, also the home of everyone’s favourite Joy Division tribute act, Editors (I love you really Tom!). Their new album is their third, and marks a shift in sound for the girls, from spunky hip hop as demonstrated on their previous material, to a sleek new sound which owes just a little bit to a certain Miss GaGa…

Oh dear. Break it to me slowly – is it good, or is it Cascada style shit?
You can decide for yourself, right here, right now (aren’t I good to you!):

Exactly what I thought.


The problem here, readers, is that Sirens in their previous form, were not bad at all. And Stilettos itself isn’t a bad song, really, though it could definitely do with having its production improved, and they could draft in a proper rapper to do the ‘put your hands up’ bits, but overall, despite the fact that it sounds like it’s been scraped off the bottom of Lady GaGa’s ridiculously high shoes, it’s an okay song that you can imagine dancing to drunkenly in one of those clubs that sell you sugar laden cocktails for £2. And thats ok, because sometimes the world needs songs like that.

The real cringeworthy thing about this is the video, which looks like it had a budget of about £3, and features the three lovely Sirens ladies looking more awkward than anyone in the history of film ever has. And that’s a shame. No one wants a pop band that doesn’t look like it believes in itself. And they used to look like this! What happened?!

They have some great songs up on their MySpace, including the bloody brilliant Dreams (the ‘retro edit’ that’s up on their MySpace is especially brilliant), and Club LA LA, which sounds like it’s by a completely different band – one that can actually stand up to their schpeel of being so unique and breaking the rules of conventional all girl bands, instead of one that appears to be jumping on the nearest available bandwagon, attempting to appeal to people who can actually see right through them without having to try very hard at all.

If they were clever, they’d be still making songs like Club La La, and some of their older stuff such as Baby (Off The Wall) and attempting to steal some of N Dubz’ fans, and those who still mourn for the loss of TLC, Eve and the like. It’s hypocritical to still be peddling this message that they’re real, and talented, and have attitude, when they look like they’ve just stepped out of GaGa’s Pokerface video. They obviously have some problem with ‘manufactured’ music, which, as they state ever so graciously and without a hint of bitterness at all, means that you can’t wear skimpy clothing, or have people write songs for you, or revel in celebrity. So why ape someone who pretty much embodies everything they claim to hate?

What do you think? Is GaGa-lite music for them, or are they just pretending in the hope that this will finally line their record label’s pockets?

Find Sirens on:



  1. Posted August 14, 2010 at 12:05 am | Permalink

    Well, I agree they’re going the wrong way and the video you posted is terrible D: but I’d like to make tha point that Lady Gaga writes her own songs. And also that artists who don’t like fame are the stupidest paradox I’v ever encountered! xx

    • Posted August 14, 2010 at 10:29 am | Permalink

      Oh, I know she writes her own stuff, what I meant was that she’s not bothered about having co-writers, which this band seems massively opposed to! Its not all that clear so ill fix it when I get time :)
      And I know, what’s the point of being signed and releasing singles if you don’t want to be famous?! That’s what irked me the most about this band – their attitude towards fame and stuff! Xx

  2. Posted August 14, 2010 at 10:12 pm | Permalink

    Ugh, they all look just like Lady Gaga clones!

    • Posted August 14, 2010 at 10:18 pm | Permalink

      I know! It’s even worse when you consider they were actually somewhere near ‘unique’ before. I found out after I’d finished writing this that apparently Michelle Heaton (she of fake tan and Liberty X fame) was in the band before they released their first single – how weird!

  3. Posted August 15, 2010 at 3:57 am | Permalink

    I am not big fan of gaga´s songs or videos but I agree she is a nice artist, witer her songs, dances and has charisma and her songs are very danceble. She is on the spotlight now so,she must be good, isn´t she? ;)

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